Guest blog by Tasha Blasi, an integrative fertility consultant, patience advocate and founder of the Fertilitites Unite (FU) Project.
If you’re anything like me, being around family and friends can be challenging…especially during the holidays. These events can produce hurtful comments that are not meant to be hurtful – but feel like a kick in the gut. The friend that meant well by telling you to just stop trying so hard and you’ll get pregnant. The aunt who can’t help herself and loves to talk about how she just had to look at her husband to get pregnant. The in-laws who love to make side comments about how they’re not getting younger and would sure love grandchildren. I know it all too well!
Part of optimizing your fertility is emotionally decluttering your mind. A great way to start this is to be authentic with people you care about instead of keeping it in when something is being done to you that makes you feel “sick.” When too many of the wrong things get stored in your body, on a cellular level, your body goes into “survival mode” and that is the opposite of “reproductive mode”. Setting boundaries is healthy. Telling the people that love you most how they can show up for you, how they can support you on your fertility journey, only helps you – especially if you’ve pulled away from them during this process.
Here are some talking points that might help you have a loving but direct conversation with them. Note: These are not talking points for your partner! There are different talking points for them.
1.) Give thanks and love to them and their friendship/support. Share how much they mean to you and how important their friendship/support is to you.
2.) Show your vulnerability. Explain that this extraordinary journey, like any other extraordinary journey, comes with some ups and downs that are making you a bit emotional (or sea-sick).
3.) Show your strength. Explain how confident you are in doing hard things and how you have always been successful in the past, and how this is no different.
4.) Promise them that when there is news to share, you will share it and thank them for understanding what news you are keeping close to your heart and not sharing.
5.) Give thanks and love to them and their support and understanding. Your journey may not be easy but your relationships don’t have to suffer. And remember the most important thing about fertility- it is a byproduct of overall health and wellness so the better you take care of yourself, the more fertile you will be. What to do? You can start by using the amazing support network you have here at Circle+Bloom! And if you are interested in learning how my team and I help women optimize their fertility and create better fertility treatments and strategies with your doctor, just send me a note.
Tasha Blasi is an integrative fertility consultant, patience advocate and founder of the Fertilitites Unite (FU) Project. In creating the FU Project (2016), Tasha relied on her long personal journey through IVF, her degree and background in the sciences, and the accumulation of data collected from hundreds of IVF cases, in 13+ countries, she has worked on through the years to create a formula of what gets in the way of women getting and staying pregnant. She approaches her scientifically proven advice in a fun, unfiltered, humorous tone. She knows that if she can provide her clients with clarity, love and support on their journey, they will naturally have confidence moving forward. Learn more about Tasha by visiting her website.