Trying to Conceive and Negative Influences Getting in the Way?

When it comes to getting pregnant, it seems that everyone in your life wants to have their say and provide you with their opinions (whether those opinions are wanted or not). Unfortunately, negative influences do not help you get pregnant. Disapproving looks from your mother-in-law and rude questions from co-workers can definitely take a toll on your mental well being. That is why it is so important to develop positive support groups while learning how to ignore those who give you negative thoughts and feelings as you try to become pregnant.

One customer told us that they had a hard time with negative influences. They could not have a single dinner with her own mother-in-law without her giving me a disapproving look and posing the question, “Are you sure it isn’t that you’re just infertile? I was pregnant one month after getting married.” Needless to say, every time she left one of these dinners she felt a little bit smaller and more of her self esteem and positive thinking went right down the drain. Then there was that one certain co-worker who, oddly enough, seemed to know her own menstrual cycle almost better than she did and would ask me in an overly-nice tone that was meant to be anything but, “Another negative test this month?” She said she always wondered how it became her business that she was trying to conceive and it was also odd that she paid such close attention to her personal life.

How can you help “move out the bad influences”. Find a support group with other people going through what you are going through. Click here for a list of non-profit organizations that can help you do this. The support groups will be safe harbors in a sea that is filled with negative thoughts, doubts and frustration. They will remind you that getting pregnant is not the same for everyone, and that while you may not be like your “perfect” mother-in-law, you will find the path to parenthood that is meant for you.

If you are on the journey to conception, understand that you can’t completely avoid negative people or cruel comments, but you can choose to ignore them. Understand that the words that come from these people’s mouths have nothing to do with you and everything to do with their own insecurities and issues.

Remember, the world is filled with good and bad. Even well intentioned individuals can say mean and hurtful things without realizing it. Let your mind become a filter, allowing all of the positive thoughts and advice and support into your being and making sure all of the negative comments that would cause pressure and stress roll right off your back. It’ll make this journey much, much easier.

Let us know what methods you use to remove the bad influences in your TTC journey.

{ 2 comments… add one }

  • russell davis August 5, 2011, 4:57 am

    One way I use is to remember all behaviour/comments have a positive intent. There is a positive intent behind them even if is not how you experience it. Changing my thinking to remind myself that they are doing the best, saying what they can, with their knowledge/experience/beliefs/values and this reminds me they mean well and I can let go of my negative response to it.

  • Cynthia Wilson James August 10, 2011, 8:17 am

    What a positive and true post! I love the statement “negative influences do not help you get pregnant.” I use prayer and practice replacing negative thoughts with positive ones. Needless to say with so much negative influences coming at us daily, I’m in constant prayer and replacing thoughts!

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